Question Regarding Marital Rape |
Originally published November 2011
Question: Is rape a marriage in Islam?
Answer: Like salaamu alaykum,
Thank you for asking this important question that has come to the fore in recent times and which has caused confusion for many people. Here are some important points to consider when studying this problem:
- It is absolutely haram (illegal) for a man to harm his wife. The Prophet ﷺ forbade harming others in general and heightened this ban to harm other believers. If someone is taught to keep ordinary people with whom a person does not have a special relationship, in such holiness, then that person is associated with a “weighty, serious connection” of marriage (Quran 4:21); which is "clothing" (2: 187), and who lives under ri & # 39; aaya, care and shepherd, as mentioned in the prophetic tradition? Allah described marriage as an attitude of kindness, mercy and love (30:21), and orders men to treat their wives in an honorable manner (4:19). Rape, abuse, ill-treatment and harm — whether physical, verbal or psychological — are completely unacceptable in such a relationship.
- It is true that the marriage contract gives the husband the right to intimacy with his wife and vice versa, but this does not mean that one can strive for violent or violent violence. As in any situation in which a person is deprived of his legal rights, it is necessary to go through the proper channels in order to resolve the issue in a fair and honorable manner. It never becomes permissible for someone to take responsibility for harming the other party in an erroneous attempt to “take their right.” This will be due to the type of watchfulness or desire for personal revenge, which has no place in the Islamic tradition, in which we are taught to put off such disputes with religious and legal powers. This is clearly indicated in the words of the great scholar Taki al-Din al-Subki in his comments on certain verses of the Qur'an concerning marriage:
“At a time when a husband becomes obliged to provide financial support, clothing (and other similar conditions) to his wife, he must manifest himself and not be careless in this duty, so that his wife has to file a complaint about his negligence with the judge [haakim], and at the same time spends from it own expenses. ... Similarly, a wife should respond to her husband's request for intimacy, so he would not need to file a complaint (against her) to the judge and at the same time spend on her own expenses. ”
From these statements, we see that the proper treatment of a husband or wife when they are faced with a marriage problem, which they cannot solve, is to appeal to the appropriate authority for guidance and guidance. Violence or force of any kind is not an option.
- People often advocate such behavior, citing prophetic traditions that strongly prevent women from refusing their husbands if they approach them for intimacy. Although these texts stress the importance of the wife fulfilling the sexual needs of her spouse (a reminder that the Prophet gave to men in several statements), they cannot be used to justify force. In one of these texts, the husband is described as one who, after being refused, “goes to bed in anger”. If it were truly acceptable for a man to force himself to his wife, why was there no such act, mentioned here as a viable alternative to his wife's refusal?
- Some people also try to confuse this issue by referring to verses in the Quran, which describe the disciplinary method of dealing with a wife, who nashizThese verses are probably one of the most misunderstood, misused and misused in the Qur'an in our time and should be understood in their proper exegetical context. Since an in-depth explanation of these verses is beyond the scope of this article, it suffices to say that Darb - which is often translated as “strike lightly or touch” - was strictly defined by our scientists and has many restrictions and conditions. One of them is that it is done in such a way that it does not lead to humiliation and does not cause harm to a person, and that this is done only when it is a means to help reconcile between the spouses and does not cause offense, enmity or hatred between them . It is impossible for such poems — whether lexically, exegetically, or otherwise — to be used to justify a violent or forced sexual relationship with a wife. Dr. Jamal Badavi laconically rejects these types of false claims, stating
“Any excess, cruelty, domestic violence or abuse committed by any Muslim can never be traced, honestly, to any revelation (Quran or Hadith). Such excesses and violations should be placed on the person himself (people), because it shows that they benefit Islamic teachings and prescriptions and cannot follow the true sun of the Prophet. ”
- Although marital rape would not guarantee hadd penalties in accordance with Shari'ahThis in no way means that such an act is acceptable or that it will remain unpunished by an Islamic court. Some mistakenly believe that hadd punishments are the only ones that exist in Islamic law, but they are not. Even if the act does not fall into one of the specified categories for hadd penalties cadi [judge] still has the right to punish a person with imprisonment, corporal punishment (attachment) or anything else that he considers appropriate for the situation, the committed crime and the guilty person (which is called zajr or ta & # 39; zeer). Some scientists even claim that a wife who was attacked in this way by her spouse has the right jirah, or civil compensation, for her injuries.
- Some scholars condemn such an attack as sinful and contemptible, while at the same time considering it unacceptable to be called "rape." This is due to the presumption of consent implied in a legal marriage. It is important to note that such statements are not intended to indulge in behavior, but are merely an expression of legal accuracy. Taking into account such a case, scientists would not base the punishment on the sexual act itself, but on the harm, both psychological and physical, that arise from it. Such an attack, however noted, is still considered an unacceptable, sinful, and punishable scholar.
- If a man finds his wife immune to his intimacy of intimacy, he must make some efforts to be attentive, affectionate and kind to his wife and follow the numerous recommendations that the Prophet made regarding intimacy. Such problems can also be symptoms of deeper relationship problems that need to be resolved. You should always take an introspective, constructive and proactive approach to solving problems, focusing first on how you can change your own behavior to improve the situation, instead of just blaming the other side or trying to "punish". You may also need to seek advice and advice from others who have experience in these matters.
- A person who commits attacks and abuses of any kind, especially against family members, shows signs of major psychological problems that need to be treated. There is no level of frustration, anger, or overwhelming resentment — no matter how legitimate they may seem — pardoning such inhuman and heartless behavior.
I hope these moments have clarified this issue and made it clear that marital rape is not allowed or is not justified by our Deen, and in fact is a sinful postulate according to which a person can be held accountable in this life, for the future. In the very first verse of the chapter of the Qur'an, entitled "Women," Allah the Almighty warns us that we fear Him, demanding our rights against each other. He actually warns us that he fears Him twice in this verse, a sign of seriousness with which we should take such questions:
“O mankind, fear your Lord, who created you from one soul and created from her his helper and dispelled countless men and women from them. And fear Allah, through whom you claim your mutual rights and (reverence) sons who tired you: truly, Allah is always above you, the Observer ”(Koran, 4: 1)
Finally, the Prophet ﷺ taught: “Only a noble person treats women nobly, and only an ignoble person with low character disgraces women:“ May Allah make us people of noble character who fear God in our relations with others and who weigh our deeds and words long before they are weighed for us on Judgment Day.
Allah knows best.